Join our Commitment Phobia Community! | Books by the Breakup Guru | Breakup Links | Search | Commitment-Phobia Home Page
| STOP A BREAKUP | MEND A BROKEN HEART | BECOME A MAN MAGNET | WIN HIS HEART BACK | WHY WOMEN DUMP MEN | FORUMS |
ATTRACTION IS EVERYTHING! How to win back their attraction!   |   Break free from their spell  |   Become the women men adore!
Breakup With a Narcissist: Living with, loving, and leaving a narcissist. How to survive it all!

Why Men Leave  | Win An Ex Back eBooks  |  The Break Up Survivor

36 FREE Breakup & Relationship eBooks
Join our community and get
our ebooks for free! Learn how to stop your breakup for free!
How to Win Back Their Attraction!
ATTRACTION IS EVERYTHING! Here's what to do when you think they are no longer attracted to you
Did She Dump You?
Are you a nice guy and still got dumped for a jerk? Learn how to be the bastard women want, and never get dumped again!
Win Your Ex Back!
Find out how to win your ex back and keep them hopelessly attached to you forever more!

commitmentphobia community

commitment phobia banner

lifted hearts logo

commitmentphobe banner

Broken Heart Help
My Breakup Space
My Breakup Blog
My Big Breakup
Breakups Magazine
Gay/Lesbian Advice
Date a Millionaire
Get Your Boyfriend Back
Win Your Girl Back

Getting To Commitment

Mr. Steven Carter's great insights into relationship dynamics are presented here in an easy-to-understand language, and without overdoing the psychological perspectives. Many commitment questions are answered here in this book. A must read for anyone afflicted with commitment issues or involved with someone who is.


He's Scared, She's Scared

Available for the first time in paperback, this follow-up to the phenomenally successful Men Who Can't Love tackles the issue of commitmentphobia, that persistent obstacle to truly satisfying contemporary relationships. Authors Stephen Carter and Julia Sokol explore why modern men and women are torn between the desire for intimacy and the equally intense need for independence. Drawing on numerous interviews and real-life scenarios, and written with humor, insight, and the kind of wisdom gained by personal experience, He's Scared, She's Scared offes guidance for all of us who want genuine, sustained intimacy with our romantic partners.


Men Who Can't Love

This book saved me from going crazy and from wasting any more of my precious time with a man who is a consumate commitmentphobic. I got this book after a therapist friend of mine said that all my complaining and moaning about my commitmentphobic boyfriend sounded just like the people in this book she'd read - "Men Who Can't Love". I got on line and nabbed a copy. What a life saver! My jaw dropped as I read this book because it describes the behaviors of commitmentphobics precisely as I have been experiencing my boyfriend's behavior. It's so true that the more I pressed him for answers while trying to understand his avoidant behaviors, the more he withdrew from me. "I don't wanna talk about it" is his mantra. All his behaviors were laid out like his biography in this book. It was shocking and revealing at the same time.


I Hate You, Don't Leave Me: Understanding the Borderline Personality

This is a great book for an inside look at Borderline Personality Disorder. If you have a person with BPD in life this book is a must have. If you have BPD it will help you understand that some of your behaviors that seem unusual to other are understandable and can be explained and treated.

Are you (or are you with) a Commitment-Phobe?
By Toni Coleman

We hear it all the time. "He just won't make a commitment." "She just wants some space right now." "I'm not sure if I'm ready for a serious relationship."

What does having a fear of commitment really mean? Actually, it means basically what it says. For SOME reason you, or someone you are involved with, isn't ready to take this relationship (or any relationship) to the next step.

So how do we know if we or our (hoped for) partner are truly afraid of commitment? How do we know that it's not something else? Is there any real difference between these two anyway?

Do these excuses sound familiar? "I'm just under a lot of stress right now." "It's not you, it's me." "I can't focus on a relationship right now because of my overloaded schedule."

Very often, we want to accept these reasons because we fear the real truth. Other times, we are just very confused by our feelings and the often mixed messages from the other person.

So, how do we evaluate our ability to make a long-term commitment? How do we know if he/she is really ready or willing?

How to Win Back Their Attraction!
ATTRACTION IS EVERYTHING! Here's what to do when you think they are no longer attracted to you

36 FREE Breakup & Relationship eBooks
Join our community and get
our ebooks for free! Learn how to stop your breakup and win your ex back for free!

Broken Heart?
Find out how to mend your brokenheart caused by a broken relationship. Advice from The Breakup Guru.
Did She Dump You?
Are you a nice guy and still got dumped for a jerk? Learn how to be the bastard women want, and never get dumped again!
Win Your Ex Back!
Find out how to win your ex back and keep them hopelessly attached to you forever more!

There are only two real issues here to examine.

The first issue involves looking at a true fear of commitment itself. If this is the problem it's important for the person with this fear to ask themselves a few key questions.

Are you concerned about the idea of forever?
Do you fear you could make a mistake in who you choose?
Do you fear a loss of your freedom/autonomy?
Are you afraid of a bad marriage- like your parents for instance?
Do you fear you would be a bad mate?

If you answered yes to any of these, it would be a good idea to begin working to understand where these feelings come from. Once you understand them better, you can choose to address them.

Perhaps you need more time or emotional growth before you consider making a long-term commitment. There can be several factors that influence your fear. Explore these and arm yourself with a plan to put them to rest.

If you would like to deal with past relationship feelings, understand if you are relationship ready or evaluate your self-awareness, go to http://www.consum-mate.com/articles.htm for articles that can assist you with these issues.

Greater self-knowledge will help you to overcome this block to building a lasting and satisfying relationship.

The second issue is the inability to make a commitment to a PARTICULAR relationship. This may not be the right one. Perhaps there is a sense of this but it is written off to being a "commitment -phobe" in general.

Focus on the true level of involvement with each other. Is there a genuine connection? Or is there a vague feeling of something missing? Evaluate the quality of your intimate relating. This does not mean how often (or even how good) the sex is. This is about how open, sharing and real you are in your interactions with each other.

Does any of this sound familiar?

It seems like we are only killing time?

He/she doesn't seem to want what I want.

We seem to be off and on in our level of contact/affection.

I/they are still not over a past relationship.

I/they just don't seem to know what I/they want.

Remember to focus on the involvement or lack thereof between you. If either person is disengaged in any way, it's time to address the real issue of; "Is this the right relationship for us?"

Exploring your ability to make a lasting commitment should be a first step in your plan for building a healthy and lasting relationship.

Toni Coleman, MSW is a licensed psychotherapist, relationship coach and founder of http://www.consum-mate.com. As a recognized expert, Toni has been quoted in many local and national publications including: The Chicago Tribune, The Orlando Sentinel, New York Daily News, Indianapolis Star and Newsweek newspapers and Family Circle, Woman's Day, Cosmo Style, Tango, Men’s Health, Star (regularly quoted body language expert), and Nirvana magazines. She has been featured on abcnews.com; discovery.health.com; aolnews.com; MSN.com, Match.com and planetearthradio.com. Toni offers dating help and relationship advice as the weekly love and dating coach on the KTRS Radio Morning Show (St. Louis, MO) and through her syndicated column, “Dear Dating Coach.” Her newsletter, The Art Of Intimacy, helps over fifty-five hundred subscribers with its dating and relationship advice. Toni is a member of The International Coach Federation, The International Association Of Coaches and The National Association of Social Workers.

From Commitment Phobe to "I Do"! A ten-step plan for winning your CP's heart and getting that long overdue & much deserved commitment. Get the Commitment Phobe to Make a Commitment! Join Our Awesome Community and talk with other CPs and CP Lovers!

Dream Chasers: The Commitment Phobe Addiction (Falling in Love and Dealing with a Commitmentphobic Person). You can be reading this insightful information, written especially for those who are in love with a commitment phobic person, in less than two minutes! (NOTE: This webBook is free when you join our community!)

Fellow CP's and CP lovers! Let's hear your stories!

Our Articles
Our Stories
Commitment Phobe Profiles
Our Commitment Phobia Support Community

Breakup With a Narcissist: Living with, loving, and leaving a narcissist. How to survive it all!

OUR MEMBERS' BOOK RECOMMENDATIONS

Win Boyfriend Back
How to Get Your Ex-Boyfriend Back - By using these basic, down-to-earth strategies, anyone can get an ex-boyfriend back and turn a broken relationship back into a loving, lasting one - or make their current relationships deeper and more fulfilling.

Relationship Links

Cunnilingus Academy
Curl her toes with these tips and techniques!

THE ZODIAC MAN!
Because not all men are alike, the way to win their heart, or the plan to win them back shouldn't be the same, either! 

why women cheat
perfect love letters

The Girls' Guide to Surviving a Break-Up
The essential female companion from the first moment he walks out of your life! The Girls' Guide to Surviving a Break-Up offers step-by-step advice for getting over him.

The Hell with Love: Poems to Mend a Broken Heart
Finally a book of poetry that describes every emotion you go through when you are in love and heart broken. This book is amazing and wonderful. I recommend it to who ever loves poetry and ever had a broken heart.

He's Just Not That Into You (The Newly Expanded Edition): The No-Excuses Truth to Understanding Guys
It seems like everywhere you turn the phrase "He's just not that into you" is being thrown around. And for good reason! The ladies are finally done waiting by the phone - hey, why sit at home for the phone to ring when it's so obvious that he's just not that into you?

Women Men Love, Women Men Leave: What Makes Men Want to Commit?
In easy psychological terms, this book helps a woman understand why a man may react negatively to her even when she feels she's doing everything right for a relationship. With different female personalities portrayed, the reader will find themselves fitting one or more of the profiles.

BreakupPoems.com  |   Breakup-Songs.com  |  AboutYourBreakup.com
Recover from the pain of heartbreak. You can feel better - today!
Save your relationship and stop your breakup, separation, or divorce. Simple tricks to getting your partner back.

Have a relationship question? STOP using general search engines and start
using the Relationship Directory to find the relationship answers you're looking for!

Please Visit Our Sponsors

The Breakup Guru
============
Borderland Blues Gay & Lesbian Advice
============

AS SEEN ON SOCIETYSURF.COM - YOUR RELATIONSHIP WEBSITE COMMUNITY & DIRECTORY!

Copyright ©  2009 Lifted Hearts Network. All Rights Reserved - Commitment-Phobia dot com is a subsidiary of the Lifted Hearts Network
Stop a Break Up and Get Him or Her, Girlfriend or Boyfriend, Back, Mend or Get over a Breakup and Broken Relationship, Find answers to Commitmentphobia
Questions? MsTigressLuv at aol.com

BreakupPoems.com   |   Breakup-Songs.com

Tigress is on FaceBook! You can become a fan of Tigress at FaceBook's TigressLuv Fan Page or you can become her friend at her FaceBook Page / Join her on Twitter

Win Back Your Ex

Copyright Tigress Luv and The Lifted Hearts Network All Rights Reserved